Holiday Breakthrough

"Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.

~Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet      

As the holiday season rolls around, some of us lose the balance we have in our daily lives, and instead, dive full blown into feeding our egos.  Our focus can become distorted and our familiar structures and routines literally disappear.  Stretched in overwhelm, we can spend our energy trying to look good, do enough, chase perfectionism or seek approval. We can lose ourselves in the creating of our holiday production!

This is a recent attitude shift for me regarding the Christmas season. It stems from personal loss and my own profound grief.  Expressing this truth prompts me either to hide or to "lighten up" as societal pressures whisper, I shouldn't feel this way. Yet, my perception has changed and my life filters are dramatically different.

I have a new found understanding and appreciation for many whose holiday experiences and memories aren't so full of joy and abundance.

This can be a dark time of year.  Not just in earth's night but in the hearts of those who suffer.  Today there exists great anger, unrest and destruction ~ dramatically born from pain, loss, and confusion.  Our world and the speed in which we live, greatly challenges us to commit to a higher calling. 

What if we surrender our blinders?  What if we allow our sacrifice and experience to transcend judgment and limitation?  Could we breakthrough our own pain to emerge with compassion and love for others?  And could we make a conscious choice to trust our light to our brothers and sisters?

After all , isn't that what Jesus came to show us?

Gratitude for You

At times our own light goes out 

and is rekindled by a spark 

from another person. 

Each of us has cause to think with 

deep gratitude of those who have lighted 

the flame within us. 

~ Albert Schweitzer

I especially like this quote from Albert Schweitzer. It reminds me of the immeasurable influence and power each of us has to lift another. Weeks prior to Thanksgiving, I was focused on past memories and lost in the emptiness without my parents.  I felt swallowed in grief and in longing for my familiar.

Yet everywhere I turned was someone ready to support me, remind me of the truth, or to share their light and love with me in the moment. 

Whether it was a patient ear, an empathetic message, or a loving hug, I sensed a constant energy holding me up and reminding me that life is good.  

I have so much to be grateful for ~ past, Present, and future!

Today I Celebrate my gratitude for you ~ my friends and family. 

Thank you for "being the spark" that reignites my heart, again and again. 

BE - Your Gratitude

"Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. 

Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. 

Thankfulness may consist merely of words. 

Gratitude is shown in acts." 

~Henry F. Amiel

As most of us jump into the business of Thanksgiving, we might forget to show up for the meaning of this holiday. The busy-ness of shopping, preparing, scheduling, or traveling could dictate our actions while expectation and emotion might dominant our thoughts.

In this next week, let us consciously demonstrate our gratitude by being present, slowing ourselves down, and actively listening to others.

May we participate in "acts of thanks~giving" by honestly expressing our acknowledgement, Gratitude, and Love. 

Who I am NOT!

Every once in a while I need to be recharged, to be inspired a new, to reconnect with my tribe and to step out of the rat race and into the "human" one.

Spending five days in San Diego with Dr Robert Holden, his Coaching Success workshop, and being immersed in a loving conscious community, successfully accomplished all of that and more.

 Robert Holden was all about having "a conversation", posing challenging inquiries, and deliciously entertaining us. We welcomed new perspectives and refocused ourselves to a more engaging presence.

 So much of what Robert shared was familiar to me. I recognized the truth in his instruction and his stories. I was reminded of what I know, yet had forgotten. I felt encouraged to shed my coat of armor to don a cape of courage!

"Success....is knowing who you are." ~ Robert Holden
 

Knowing who we are is rediscovering our "unconditioned selves". It's about reconnecting with our real selves, our original potential, our spiritual essence, that true nature that existed before we identified ourselves by outer words and others' criteria.

 We mostly live our lives as our "learned selves" seeing the world through the perception lens of our self image. Our self image is a shadow of ourselves, our Ego, a conglomerate of how others have defined us, our acquired beliefs and our own self judgement.

 I thought about the ways I still limit myself and the occasional punishing language or messages of self-doubt that can surface. I thought about the way I feel every time I deny my intuitive voice and make choices and decisions that do not serve me. I thought about the times I get derailed from my goal and spiral off my path in distraction. Then I thought about how I feel whenever I'm aligned with my false self of . . .who I am not! 

And then Robert invited us to ask ourselves this question:

"What's it like to be me when I'm not playing the role?"

Partnering with the Reaper

"We don't beat 'The Reaper' by living longer.

We beat 'The Reaper' by living well and living fully."

         ~Professor, Randy Pausch

Years ago, I accompanied my Mother to a seminar on Death & Dying at the Arvada Methodist Church.  The two most remarkable breakout sessions were viewing Professor Randy Pausch's  "The Last Lecture"and a workshop where we were introduced to "Five Wishes".

Many of you might remember Randy Pausch, the professor , who after being diagnosed with terminal cancer, spent the last year of his Life focusing, compiling and sharing everything he believed about living ~ in his last lecture at Carnegie Mellon.

His lecture was entitled, " Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams". "It was about the importance of overcoming obstacles, of enabling the dreams of others, and of seizing every moment...(because 'time is all you have...and you may find one day that you have less than you think')" 
I remember two questions he posed that I believe are worthwhile for each of us to consider:

"What wisdom would we impart to the world 

if we knew it was our last chance?

 If we had to vanish tomorrow, what would we want 

as our legacy?"

"Five Wishes" offers us a structured format for documenting exactly how we want to be treated if we get seriously ill. Inspired by Jim Towey who worked with Mother Teresa for 12 years, "Five Wishes" has been called the first "living will with heart and soul".

 My Mother and I spent the day learning and discussing dying and death, what was most meaningful in our lives and what care or course of action we'd want if we became seriously ill.  Those real conversations and the sweet time we spent together, live on in my heart as a cherished memory.

 So in keeping with who she was, my Mother promptly completed her "Five Wishes" document and made sure we knew she stored it in the bookcase.  Ironically, it was what we turned to when she died suddenly, three years ago. 

We were able to go right to her wishes and carry them out without argument!  Her every detail, written out in her own hand, gave us some sort of comfort and direction.  And although we felt clearly robbed of more time with her, we celebrate the way she lived, reminding us each day, to be present with courage, curiosity, and compassion.

My intention in sharing this with you today is merely to catch your attention!  And perhaps to remind you to slow down... to consider what is truly important and valuable in your Life. I implore you to make conscious choices that honor who you really are and the contribution you make to others.

 As Professor Pausch reminded us in his last lecture,

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, 

just how we play the hand." 

It's your deal!

Below is a link to a sample of Five Wishes

http://www.agingwithdignity.org/forms/5wishes.pdf